So What DO Dreams Really Mean Anyway?

There's an old rhetorical question in psychology circles: "If a tree falls in the forest and there's no one around to hear it, does it make a sound?" my reaction to that question is the same as my reaction to the other perennial pop psychology question: "What do dreams mean?"

The truth of the matter is, I don't care what your dreams mean, and find that all of the books you could possibly buy at a Walden would give you, at best, conjecture. Those of you who are a part of this DIY psychoanalysis movement should know that you're playing with very serious emotional questions and, as such, should refrain from issuing opinions on what your friends' dreams mean unless you actually know what you're talking about-- and incidentally, taking a handful of surveys on Facebook doesn't make you an expert. It makes you someone who knows how to click circular buttons on a website.

Interpreting dreams is kind of like interpreting Rorsach inkblots: ever dream that you might have certainly has personal meaning to you, and with the help of someone trained in actually dream interpretation, you might be able to figure out some valuable things about the ways you emotionally process information or situations. On the other hand, the fact that you typed the phrase "what do dreams mean" into a search bar means that you think you'll find a ready-made list of "answers" to what it might mean if last night you dreamed that a purple-and-gray-spotted giraffe was felating your father-in-law while your mother-in-law sat in the corner singing "Camptown Races" at the top of her lungs.

You won't. In fact, if I've just accurately described the dream you had last night, I suggest that you simply ignore that the dream happened at all. Some things are best left well enough alone.

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